One of markings of a good introvert is thoughtfulness or internal processing. Sometimes the Introvert can get frustrated because people see them being thoughtful and they chalk it up to indecisiveness, apathy, or lack of leadership. We try to debunk that myth here at the Introverted Soul, but after some thought and some conviction from scripture, I have to admit that sometimes this is true.
I notice that oftentimes I can think things through, have the best of intentions of following through, but then I don't follow through. Call it laziness, selfishness, or apathy, but none of those are attributes that I desire. James 2:17 constantly convicts of me this. I can have all the faith in the world (to me this represents the Introvert who has the internal faith) but if that faith doesn't manifest itself outwardly (this would be the Extrovert who is naturally more outwardly expressive) then I've got some issues.
So as much as I believe in thoughtfulness, I can easily overload on it, and lean on it as a crutch for inaction. The inaction makes all the thoughtfulness, good intentions, and faith, mean nothing.
Introverted Inspirtation in Scripture
In late 2009, I committed to memorizong 100 Psalms. I failed. I only memorized 24, and now the ones I had memorized have started to fade away so I can only recall bits and pieces. BUT it was still a fruitful exercise, so much so that I've recommitted to that goal but this time taking route that is more thought-through (in typical introverted fashion), adopting the "marathon" mindset rather than the "sprint" mindset.
One of the Psalms I recently committed to memory was Psalm 131. There's a line in there that gives me some peace and inspiration as the Introveted Soul. The line reads: "I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me, but I have stilled and quieted my soul."
This passage has both reminded me and challenged me.
It has reminded me of the perfection God. One moment he's challenging the Introvert with the call to shout for joy and lift our hands , and then the next He's reminding the Introvert that there's purpose and value in how He has created us by calling us to stillness and quietness.
It challenges me to harness that natural response of stillness and quietness and make it an intentional feeding of my soul, not just an outward behavior. It is an awesome challenge, and thankfully I believe the Introvert is well equipped for this.
How is God reminding and challenging you through His Word?
One of the Psalms I recently committed to memory was Psalm 131. There's a line in there that gives me some peace and inspiration as the Introveted Soul. The line reads: "I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me, but I have stilled and quieted my soul."
This passage has both reminded me and challenged me.
It has reminded me of the perfection God. One moment he's challenging the Introvert with the call to shout for joy and lift our hands , and then the next He's reminding the Introvert that there's purpose and value in how He has created us by calling us to stillness and quietness.
It challenges me to harness that natural response of stillness and quietness and make it an intentional feeding of my soul, not just an outward behavior. It is an awesome challenge, and thankfully I believe the Introvert is well equipped for this.
How is God reminding and challenging you through His Word?
Praying for your spouse
I've recently embarked on a quest to be more intentional about praying for my wife. We got off to a great start, but we've stumbled in the past couple of weeks, so this post from my good friend Harrison lit the fire under me again. This is the quote that particularly spoke to me:
Dr Fincham suspects that the act of praying about romantic partners leads people to view their relationship as something sacred and not to be damaged. This, he argues, is the force that is reducing infidelity in the study.
Here at the Introverted Soul, I constantly try to promote the assets of being the Introvert, but there are times when those assets drift into hindrances. For example, the Introvert is very thoughtful, which I think can lead to wisdom and clarity of action, but sometimes that's all the Introvert does! We get bogged down by thinking that there's never any action. I'm the king of good intentions...I spend so much time thinking about good things I need to do (like praying for and with my wife) but I'm also the king of excuses. I can easily rationalize why I never implement my good intentions.
This interview and study challenged me to take action with my prayer, and also clarified why I need to do this. A pastor at my church, Phil Hargrove, said that prayer with/for your wife can be more intimate than sex...I can definitely see the truth in that, because prayer with/for your wife creates a spiritual connection, and our perspetive of our wives shifts from being just a sexual parnter to a spiritual and divine partnership. It's hard to imagine a deeper connection than that.
Bottom line, I need to get about the business of doing the things now (intentional prayer for my wife) that will lead to what I want down the road (a strong, deep, spiritual relationship with my bride).
Check out Harrison's blog post:
the bottlenecked blog: Limits of Human Progress and the Power of Prayer: "Earlier this year I posted C.S. Lewis' fictional description of hell, a world without scarcity. Before that I had confessed that a world wit..."
Dr Fincham suspects that the act of praying about romantic partners leads people to view their relationship as something sacred and not to be damaged. This, he argues, is the force that is reducing infidelity in the study.
Here at the Introverted Soul, I constantly try to promote the assets of being the Introvert, but there are times when those assets drift into hindrances. For example, the Introvert is very thoughtful, which I think can lead to wisdom and clarity of action, but sometimes that's all the Introvert does! We get bogged down by thinking that there's never any action. I'm the king of good intentions...I spend so much time thinking about good things I need to do (like praying for and with my wife) but I'm also the king of excuses. I can easily rationalize why I never implement my good intentions.
This interview and study challenged me to take action with my prayer, and also clarified why I need to do this. A pastor at my church, Phil Hargrove, said that prayer with/for your wife can be more intimate than sex...I can definitely see the truth in that, because prayer with/for your wife creates a spiritual connection, and our perspetive of our wives shifts from being just a sexual parnter to a spiritual and divine partnership. It's hard to imagine a deeper connection than that.
Bottom line, I need to get about the business of doing the things now (intentional prayer for my wife) that will lead to what I want down the road (a strong, deep, spiritual relationship with my bride).
Check out Harrison's blog post:
the bottlenecked blog: Limits of Human Progress and the Power of Prayer: "Earlier this year I posted C.S. Lewis' fictional description of hell, a world without scarcity. Before that I had confessed that a world wit..."
Don't apologize
I hear the Introvert all too often apologizing for being introverted. It frustrates me at times because it builds up the myth that being introverted is wrong, a social handicap, or a poor business practice. The goal should be not to apologize for being introverted but to use the introversion in such a way that it becomes an asset to you and to those you serve.
To start doing this, it would be wise to communicate with those around you that you are introverted and tend to approach things differently. Let people know that you tend to need to marinate on things before landing on a response. I used to feel pressured to come up with an answer to certain questions right on the spot, and still do feel that way at times, but I've found that embracing my thoughtfulness as a strength, consistently communicating this need to others, and then actually delivering wise and clear responses works very well.
If someone asks me a question that I need to think through, I'm getting to a point to where I don't feel pressured to respond immediately, but I'm able to fight that urge and instead respond by confidently communicating that I need to think this through and get back to them. And guess what? They are always happy to do so, and not once has anyone responded negatively to this. Not only does it send a signal to them that I think their question is important enough to merit some extra thought, but most of the time I'm able to come back very soon with a well thought out and clear response.
So don't apologize for the methods that lead you to success, but embrace embrace it as a strength, and I think it will improve how the Introvert contributes and the respect that others give to the Introverted Soul.
To start doing this, it would be wise to communicate with those around you that you are introverted and tend to approach things differently. Let people know that you tend to need to marinate on things before landing on a response. I used to feel pressured to come up with an answer to certain questions right on the spot, and still do feel that way at times, but I've found that embracing my thoughtfulness as a strength, consistently communicating this need to others, and then actually delivering wise and clear responses works very well.
If someone asks me a question that I need to think through, I'm getting to a point to where I don't feel pressured to respond immediately, but I'm able to fight that urge and instead respond by confidently communicating that I need to think this through and get back to them. And guess what? They are always happy to do so, and not once has anyone responded negatively to this. Not only does it send a signal to them that I think their question is important enough to merit some extra thought, but most of the time I'm able to come back very soon with a well thought out and clear response.
So don't apologize for the methods that lead you to success, but embrace embrace it as a strength, and I think it will improve how the Introvert contributes and the respect that others give to the Introverted Soul.
Montreat Weekend Internal Processing Part II
This is Part II from yesterday's post about the Montreat Weekend:
3. Equipment- a HUGE concern and stress was equipment. This was because we were going to have to bring ALL of our own equipment (drums, mics, cables, speakers, etc.) and have to set it up on Saturday night. We then found out a couple of days prior, that there was an event occurring on Saturday Night and Sunday morning, and were told that we would have to set up all of our equipment late Saturday night (starting at 9PM), could only rehearse until 11PM (due to a noise ordinance), move all of our equipment off stage to accommodate the event the next morning, then move all of our equipment on stage following the morning event (ending at 9:50AM), and be ready to start playing prelude music at 10:15 AM. WHOA! I was STRESSED! But we trusted in the Lord, loaded all of our equipment, and headed to Montreat praying for a miracle. WELL, when we arrived, we discovered that there was a band playing music for the event, and they said we could use ALL of their equipment. This meant no need to worry about setting up, tearing down, etc. because it was already set up and would be set up the next morning. So while we did have to load all of our equipment and tote it up there, we didn't have to worry about any set-up and tear-down, and the stress of time constraints were washed away. We realized that we would NEVER have been able to have made everything happen it if weren't for that miracle. PRAISE THE LORD!
4. Devotion- that Sunday morning, we were feeling pretty awestruck at the Lord for what he had already done on our trip. We held a devotion following breakfast in which we discussed idolatry. We spent 45 minutes talking through some biblical concepts of idolatry, and how we can apply that our lives and our worship. Well during the service, there were 2 congregation responsive prayers that took directly from passages of scripture on idolatry and used other wordings that spoke about idolatry. WOW! We all started looking around at each other, feeling totally weirded out!
5. The Response- as I said, even through all the amazing reminders the Lord gave us about His faithfulness, we were still nervous about playing for the more traditional congregation. Following the sermon, we walked on stage to lead in "Revelation Song." As I said, the sermon centered around scripture that were right in line with the song, so we were hopeful the congregation would see the link, and be moved by the music. But "Revelation Song" is a pretty rocking song at times, so there was still uneasiness...but...WHOA! Frances Reid sang the solo of the song, and sang it beautifully, the rest of the band played with excellence, but more important the Spirit moved in a powerful way during the song. The congregation actually erupted in applause after the song was finished, and we were left with feelings of humility at how big God is and again left totally awestruck. Countless people approached us afterwards with compliments and words of encouragement.
All of these illustrations of God's faithfulness are just echoes of the resounding theme of the experience: When we are weak, He is STRONG! All of us in the band came into that experience feeling weak and afraid because we were stepping into the unknown. But thankfully we were stepping into the unknown by faith, and the Lord honored that by knocking us onto our knees and putting us in a state of surrender, allowing us to experience is awesome strength and sovereignty. Through every experience we were all humbled even more, moving us into a state of dependency and weakness; fertile soil for the Lord. What an amazing experience of holy revelation, and one that I will not soon forget!
3. Equipment- a HUGE concern and stress was equipment. This was because we were going to have to bring ALL of our own equipment (drums, mics, cables, speakers, etc.) and have to set it up on Saturday night. We then found out a couple of days prior, that there was an event occurring on Saturday Night and Sunday morning, and were told that we would have to set up all of our equipment late Saturday night (starting at 9PM), could only rehearse until 11PM (due to a noise ordinance), move all of our equipment off stage to accommodate the event the next morning, then move all of our equipment on stage following the morning event (ending at 9:50AM), and be ready to start playing prelude music at 10:15 AM. WHOA! I was STRESSED! But we trusted in the Lord, loaded all of our equipment, and headed to Montreat praying for a miracle. WELL, when we arrived, we discovered that there was a band playing music for the event, and they said we could use ALL of their equipment. This meant no need to worry about setting up, tearing down, etc. because it was already set up and would be set up the next morning. So while we did have to load all of our equipment and tote it up there, we didn't have to worry about any set-up and tear-down, and the stress of time constraints were washed away. We realized that we would NEVER have been able to have made everything happen it if weren't for that miracle. PRAISE THE LORD!
4. Devotion- that Sunday morning, we were feeling pretty awestruck at the Lord for what he had already done on our trip. We held a devotion following breakfast in which we discussed idolatry. We spent 45 minutes talking through some biblical concepts of idolatry, and how we can apply that our lives and our worship. Well during the service, there were 2 congregation responsive prayers that took directly from passages of scripture on idolatry and used other wordings that spoke about idolatry. WOW! We all started looking around at each other, feeling totally weirded out!
5. The Response- as I said, even through all the amazing reminders the Lord gave us about His faithfulness, we were still nervous about playing for the more traditional congregation. Following the sermon, we walked on stage to lead in "Revelation Song." As I said, the sermon centered around scripture that were right in line with the song, so we were hopeful the congregation would see the link, and be moved by the music. But "Revelation Song" is a pretty rocking song at times, so there was still uneasiness...but...WHOA! Frances Reid sang the solo of the song, and sang it beautifully, the rest of the band played with excellence, but more important the Spirit moved in a powerful way during the song. The congregation actually erupted in applause after the song was finished, and we were left with feelings of humility at how big God is and again left totally awestruck. Countless people approached us afterwards with compliments and words of encouragement.
All of these illustrations of God's faithfulness are just echoes of the resounding theme of the experience: When we are weak, He is STRONG! All of us in the band came into that experience feeling weak and afraid because we were stepping into the unknown. But thankfully we were stepping into the unknown by faith, and the Lord honored that by knocking us onto our knees and putting us in a state of surrender, allowing us to experience is awesome strength and sovereignty. Through every experience we were all humbled even more, moving us into a state of dependency and weakness; fertile soil for the Lord. What an amazing experience of holy revelation, and one that I will not soon forget!
Montreat Weekend Internal Processing Part I
Being the typical Introvert, I am just getting to the point where I have processed events in my life that occurred 2 months ago, ha! But there were some amazing ministry opportunities afforded to me this summer, and I wanted to write about one such opportunity. After writing this all out, I decided I needed to break this into 2 posts, so check out part II tomorrow:
Over the July 4th weekend, the First Pres Worship Team was given a chance to lead music and worship at the Montreat Conference Sunday morning worship, located in the beautiful mountains of North Carolina. By the grace of God, this was the only weekend this past summer where temperatures were actually extremely pleasant, which was awesome because there is no AC in the hotel we stayed or the worship auditorium. That was definitely a huge plus. However, despite the providential fortune of the weather, the band and I were very nervous about our weekend. Mainly because the style of music we play for worship is somewhat out of the box for Montreat Sunday Worship...some would say out of the box is generous because there has NEVER been that type of music used. So we were anticipating the worst, as far as response. But as we soon discovered, the gorgeous weather was just one of the ways that Lord revealed Himself to us, reminding us that that when we are weak, He is STRONG.
So here were some awesome evidence of God from that weekend:
1. The deposit- I was concerned how we were going to be able to afford our accommodations for the night, because the budget is tight, and there aren't a lot of options for lodging that are convenient to Montreat, aside from the Assembly Inn (out of our budget, we thought). BUT come to find out, First Pres had a non-refundable deposit with Montreat that had not been used, and needed to be used ASAP or else that would be money down the drain. I found out about it, booked individual rooms for all the band at the convenient and gorgeous Assembly Inn, and we were saved!
2. Scripture and Song choice- the week before, I was able to speak with the pastor that would be teaching that Sunday. He wanted to discuss some song choices, and see if there was any way we could support his message with some appropriate song choices. Of course, this made me nervous because I had already chosen songs, rehearsed them with the band, and submitted them to Montreat to print in the bulletin. But when he told me he would be preaching on Revelation 5, I had chills. The song I had submitted to Montreat to print in the bulletin for use after the sermon was a called "Revelation Song" which uses scriptures from Revelation 4 and 5! When I told him this over the phone, we both responded with some laughter, realizing that the Lord is our worship leader, bigger than all our plans and worries.
Part II to come tomorrow!!
Over the July 4th weekend, the First Pres Worship Team was given a chance to lead music and worship at the Montreat Conference Sunday morning worship, located in the beautiful mountains of North Carolina. By the grace of God, this was the only weekend this past summer where temperatures were actually extremely pleasant, which was awesome because there is no AC in the hotel we stayed or the worship auditorium. That was definitely a huge plus. However, despite the providential fortune of the weather, the band and I were very nervous about our weekend. Mainly because the style of music we play for worship is somewhat out of the box for Montreat Sunday Worship...some would say out of the box is generous because there has NEVER been that type of music used. So we were anticipating the worst, as far as response. But as we soon discovered, the gorgeous weather was just one of the ways that Lord revealed Himself to us, reminding us that that when we are weak, He is STRONG.
So here were some awesome evidence of God from that weekend:
1. The deposit- I was concerned how we were going to be able to afford our accommodations for the night, because the budget is tight, and there aren't a lot of options for lodging that are convenient to Montreat, aside from the Assembly Inn (out of our budget, we thought). BUT come to find out, First Pres had a non-refundable deposit with Montreat that had not been used, and needed to be used ASAP or else that would be money down the drain. I found out about it, booked individual rooms for all the band at the convenient and gorgeous Assembly Inn, and we were saved!
2. Scripture and Song choice- the week before, I was able to speak with the pastor that would be teaching that Sunday. He wanted to discuss some song choices, and see if there was any way we could support his message with some appropriate song choices. Of course, this made me nervous because I had already chosen songs, rehearsed them with the band, and submitted them to Montreat to print in the bulletin. But when he told me he would be preaching on Revelation 5, I had chills. The song I had submitted to Montreat to print in the bulletin for use after the sermon was a called "Revelation Song" which uses scriptures from Revelation 4 and 5! When I told him this over the phone, we both responded with some laughter, realizing that the Lord is our worship leader, bigger than all our plans and worries.
Part II to come tomorrow!!
Highlights from "Introverts in the Church"
I tend to have "eyes bigger than my stomach" when it comes to books. I'll go to the library and order and/or put holds on 5 books in anticipation of them coming available at different times so I can have a nice proportioned book diet (to keep with the eating analogy), but then of course they all come available pretty much at once, and I have to gorge myself on reading on books. This happened to me this summer, where I found myself wanting to put a towel over my bedside table so I wouldn't get stressed by the stack of unread, overdue books taunting me and my foolish book diet.
However after paying a couple of library fees, I was able to make it through my stack. One of the books I read was called "Introverts in the Church" by Adam McHugh. Of course my wife mocked me for reading such a thing, and this is probably not typical beach reading for the normal human being, but I really enjoyed the book.
So here are some highlights:
-energized by solitude-a geyser gets it's power from a subterranean water source, introverts derive their power from hidden spaces
- "Introverts don't avoid social interactions like trips to the dentist, but rather like we would avoid exercise; because we lack the energy. Long periods without quiet refueling leave introverts feeling physically exhausted and emotionally hollow."
- extroverts derive energy from outside themselves, like a reservoir relies on rainfall for water, they are filled by external sources. Too much time alone leaves them feeling drained.
- You have to distinguish between energy source and energy level.
- Introverts can recharge to a very high level of energy, but it is more quickly depleted than extroverts in social situations unless it's used efficiently. That's why a lot of introverts move a little slower, talk slower, and are often a little less high-strung.
- Introverts draw conclusions before speaking; that’s why interruptions are frustrating because we are forced to ponder new information before responding
- idea oriented- combination of solitude and internal processing leads to many introverts who are oriented towards ideas than they are interactions with people
- The quality of the day can often be gauged on the ideas, and we enjoy reflecting on our best experiences more so than we did actually living the experience
- Introverts have more active and busy brains than extroverts; More blood flow but in slower longer paths to the parts of the brain controlling long-term memory, solving problems, and planning
- Biblical Personalities- Peter displayed extroverted tendencies (quick to speak and reactive; Jacob described as a “quiet man”; Moses initially resisted the Lord because he was slow of speech and wary of public speaking
This certainly isn't all the things I gleaned, but it's just some of the stuff I found worthy to write down. The books also delves into introverted qualities of Jesus, and also practical ways for the Introverted Soul to navigate in the extroverted culture of ministry. It can definitely provide encouragement to any introverts struggling through feeling unworthy of the call of ministry due to their personalities.
So for any introverted or extroverted folks in the ministry, this book is a must read!
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